Happy April, Friends!
Not too long ago, I finished the book “The Four Agreements” by Don Miguel Ruiz, and was so inspired by one of the agreements in particular — Don’t Take Anything Personally. Growing up, I was a particularly a very sensitive child and took most (if not all) things that people said to me to heart. Now that I’m older, I’ve learned how to decipher someone’s honest truth from their need to just hear themselves speak. Let me break this down a little bit…
Day in and day out, we’re constantly connecting with one another via text, Gchat and other modes of communication. It’s very easy for feelings to be misconstrued when one is sitting behind a keyboard, cell phone or even talking face-to-face — but when you don’t take things personal, you find that whatever that person says to or about you, is really what their saying about themselves. Now, I consider myself a very open-minded individual that is always looking for ways to become a better daughter, sister, friend and professional. I believe that dialogue with like-minded people is healthy, and it gives us the opportunity to learn new things about ourselves and the world around us. However, when someone speaks negativity or offers their opinion that doesn’t necessarily uplift you, it’s ultimately up to you whether or not you are going to accept or reject it.
Over the last few weeks, I’ve had some very personal conversations with friends that have challenged me to ponder about the space that I’m currently as a young adult. While these exchanges have been rather heavy in some instances, and my responses to them have been emotionally charged, I’ve looked back on them and realized that I shouldn’t have taken any of them personally. Sure, that friend probably meant well and was coming from a good place when they said their piece, and that’s fine! And I’m not saying we should walk around like emotionless robots, but we must know how to practice discernment and not make mountains out of molehills. It’s hard at times, especially when we have respect for that person’s opinion, but to quote Deepak Chopra, “What people think of me is none of my business.”
If we spent time caring about what others thought about us, and purposely catching the shade that people threw our way, we sure would be be wasting a lot of time missing out on all of that glorious sunshine! Instead, we must always know that we are fearfully and wonderfully made, and God designed us specifically for His plan and purpose. Additionally, when we are intentional with our words and use them for GOOD, we’ll find that The Universe will return the favor. And like my granny always says, “If you know have anything nice to say, don’t say anything at all.”
I’ll leave you with a quote from “The Four Agreements”:
“As you make it a habit of not taking anything personally, you won’t need to place your trust in what others do or say. You will only need to trust yourself to make responsible choices. You are never responsible for the actions of others; you are only responsible for you.”