Happy Friday peeps!
This week went by extremely fast, but I’m convinced it is just because we all really wanted to know #WhoShotFitz on last week’s episode of Scandal. If you haven’t watched last night’s episode, I won’t give anything away — but just know that it’s getting WAY too good. And if you haven’t ever watched an episode of Scandal, what the HECK are you waiting for?! Head over to abc.com right now and catch up on all the juicy goodness!
Anyway, as of late, I’ve really began to take interest in what it means to be a ‘millennial’ in today’s society. By definition, a millennial is someone born roughly between 1978 and 1995. We are the talk of all things political, educational and economical–dominating the workplace, and making our voices heard in every corner of the world possible. But this particular article struck me because it talks about the one thing that young women my age are just tired of hearing about in the news: our dating lives. *cue the tiny violins*
Now let me just preface this and say that the article did speak to a number of points that I do find true in my own personal circle of friends: a lot of us are very ambitious, independent, and goal-oriented queens that hustle extremely hard to get what we want. We’ve got huge dreams of becoming CEOs, Supreme Court judges and maybe the next Olivia Pope (sans the infidelity of course). But when it comes to dating, we tend to alter our focus on the subject from time to time. At this particular time, I am not personally incredibly pressed about settling down with a husband, 2.5 kids and nice house with the white picket fence (that’s still every girl’s dream, right?) But by now, I can say that I’ve experienced the following: the guy that is totally amazing, but not ready for the commitment; the guy that’s exactly what I needed, but I was far from being ready for him; and the guy that I just entertain for the moment, and keep it moving. The fact that I can even come to that conclusion has allowed me to learn and grow tremendously. It’s not always easy being honest with yourself, but in this stage of life it is completely necessary.
With that, I don’t think it’s completely difficult for millennial women to find dateable men. When one is looking for a potential mate, you must be clear about what you want out of the encounter. Whether it is friendship, a FWB situation or a relationship, it’s always great to be on the same page as the person you are interacting with–it causes for less confusion. I think sometimes we (and I mean guys and girls) like to keep certain people around for convenience. In some cases, that’s fine — but after a while, playing that game can get old. Now, that doesn’t mean always whipping out the grocery list of qualities and characteristics that this person MUST possess, no. It means being confident in who you are, understanding what you do and do not like and being open to new experiences. Dating should be something seen as fun — there’s nothing serious or binding about going out with someone and enjoying their company (or getting a free meal as my friend Nikki would put it.)
Granted–I’ve found myself in a predicament or two where things were completely unplanned, chaotic and just down right overwhelming. But the beautiful thing about that is, I was able to use that as a teachable moment. I’ll be 24 next month (gee whiz) and I feel as though I’m just in the prime of my dating experiences. And trust me, it’s always great to have an amazing group of girlfriends to share the awesome/not-so awesome stories with.
So the moral of the story? Ladies (and gentlemen too)– don’t let the media try to coerce you into thinking you need to settle down tomorrow. Enjoy this time of freedom and have fun learning about yourself and the world around you. Keep being awesome and you’ll never know…Prince Charming (or Cinderella) may appear when you least expect it.
You’ve got thoughts? Speak on it!